precious

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One Response to precious

  1. ddawson says:

    Great work Precious!

    Spelling – Igloo, sweaters, didn’t

    Grammar- You have quite a few run-on sentences. Be sure to use full stops at the end of a thought.

    For example this section:

    I hade no breakfast I didnt even have anything to drink some days I would sit by the fire and make warm swaeters to trade for food but I didnt think it was helping me i needed a gardian someone to look after me someone to feed some one to lean on when i’m feeling sad.

    Could be rewritten like:
    I had no breakfast, I didn’t even have anything to drink. Some days I would sit by the fire and make warm sweaters to trade for food, but I knew I wouldn’t get enough money from that to support myself. I needed a guardian, someone to look after me, someone to feed me, someone to lean on when I was feeling sad.

    Keep up the good work Precious!
    Ms. Dawson

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