Oh gosh that sounds very scary! You have used some lovely descriptive phrases well done:
Some tips:
‘That made there visit permanent’ should be ‘their’ as the visit belongs to them
Rather than using the number 2, it would be more suitable to write it in words (two) in a story.
Oh gosh that sounds very scary! You have used some lovely descriptive phrases well done:
Some tips:
‘That made there visit permanent’ should be ‘their’ as the visit belongs to them
Rather than using the number 2, it would be more suitable to write it in words (two) in a story.